Testimony: feeling supported, owning your journey

Let us tell you about a couple who approached Prefix a few months into their decision to separate. Their ‘together’ lives were complicated and aspirational: caring for three children, building successful careers, running a stable and loving home. There was plenty of mutual respect but a clash of styles as well as certain ‘red zone’ topics. Their children were their absolute priority.

These clients were looking for early intervention from a non-lawyer mediator, to avoid feelings of escalation and retaliation, which they felt would be detrimental to them and their children.

Prefix facilitated their negotiations on all financial matters. Steadily, piece by piece, the ‘terms’ were agreed until they were ready to be converted by a lawyer and sent to the Court for a Judge to agree.

This was their feedback:

Husband’s comments

“I wanted to avoid the need for lawyers who may potentially elongate negotiations, heighten emotions and which I feared would be expensive. Engaging a Mediator immediately calmed the situation so that it became collaborative process rather than partisan.

Kate was practical in her approach, bringing her career and life experience both and her understanding of family life and relationships. Through one-to-one meetings with each of us, she was able to progress a core document containing what we had agreed and highlighting the areas where work still needed to be done. Kate was emotionally intuitive, in that that she could listen to each of our positions, reflect and digest, then feedback to each of us in a neutral way. This space and time, provided by Kate’s approach, meant that there was no fear of embarrassment or regret of saying the wrong thing in the heat of the moment. She understood the nuanced issues around momentum – balancing urgency with practical reality, and had stamina to stay the course.

I always felt that Kate was balanced, not prejudiced, and open to the fact that there are a thousand ways not ‘a right’ and ‘a wrong’. This hugely facilitated more reasonable outcomes.”

Wife’s comments:

“We had taken the decision to separate and asked for Kate’s help in guiding us through the process of dividing our assets and working out our income needs. Kate was instrumental in helping us on this difficult and painful journey by meeting with us each in turn on a rolling basis. Her skill at taking the heat out of thoughts and words to make topics more comfortable to digest and discuss was exceptional, thoughtful and so very helpful. It therefore kept things moving and us feeling that we were both being listened to. She was professional yet open, reassuring and wise.

We were able to work towards the contents of a Consent Order with minimal input from lawyers which meant it was our agenda, our wishes and our decisions. Kate was always incredibly helpful, positive and articulate in expressing thoughts, advice and guidance from start to finish. It has been an absolute blessing to have worked with her.”